Folk sayings redone as puns.

Conclusion of ornithological report, 1953: “Birds of a feather flock together”.

Lawn fertilizer technicians compare control group with test group: “The grass is greener on the other side”.

Golf course warning: “One in the hand is worth two in the bush”.

Description of window damage to inner-city Chicago tenement building: “It’s a glass-half-empty situation”.

Theory of Juggling: “What goes up must come down”.

Scottish girl fed meager meal, asks for second helping: “Lass half full”. (Paul Hughes)

Mom of minimalist 1960’s composer feeds son 6 spoons of oatmeal: “Glass half full”. (Paul Hughes)